Sportsfans and punters who took the tip last week got the choccies when Chautauqua gave us all a minor heart attack for a brief second before putting his beautiful grey head out and sending us all home a winner in the Lighting Stakes and Flemington, and those that took the tip from Herbert to Howard and Hobart and beyond found themselves laughing all the way to the bank, and plenty to readers have been driving around in flash new cars this week as a result.

Now I am acutely aware that many of the punter’s misters and missus’s have been spewing all week, decrying the fact that their beloved is scooting around on flash new wheels while they remain rooted to the seat of their clapped out 1970’s Celica.

But never fear partner’s of sportsfans, redemption day is nearly here, and if you put your faith in the punting prophet and splash out large on Sunday then next week you’ll be gliding around on wheels that put your better half’s to shame, for they received a miserly $2.80 for every dollar they invested, whereas you are about to cop $3.20 per buck invested, provided of course that you jump on immediately and without delay, for now that the word of the Arch is out the odds are sure to tumble.

And just who is this four-legged beast that Archie assure you will make your fortune? Well, only the best horse since Black Caviar, that’s all.

It’s not a galloper ridden by a stunted and starved genius like Chautauqua’s pilot Dwayne Dunn however, but rather a harnessed and hobbled hero of the like you once used to watch running around the Colosseum in the classic midday move Ben Hur.

The sensational steed’s name is Beautide, and he is running on Sunday in the time-honored Miracle Mile at Sydney’s Menangle Paceway, and will win the race by as far as his Tasmanian driver James Rattray wants him to.

Beautide has already won the race once, and run a close second another time, and has won 21/31 starts at the Western Sydney track, with 8 placings. The superstar has also won 2 Interdominion Championships – the Melbourne Cups of harness racing – and has won all three of his starts since returning to racing from a long, injury-enforced break, with Archie backing him each time and making the motza that allows you to keep reading this outstanding blog and even better tip sheet for absolutely free.

Just get on, that’s all I have to say.

And then baby, we’ll be running around in the riptide all day long, and driving BMW 4 x 4’s as we go. And don’t you worry about that.

Why, if he follows our tip, even the worst punter in the history of the world since Unzer Fritz went down to the railway line – Hedley Thomas,  the Walter Winchell of the modern age – may finally after all these years get a collect.

And if he knocks his winnings off in the Mainstream Media mares maiden at Murtoa just 2 minutes later, well don’t be pointing the finger at me.

Hedley – get off the phone to your bookie son!