Who made who, who made you?
Who made who, ain’t nobody told you?
Who made who, who made you?
If you made them and they made you
Who picked up the bill, and who made who?
Ain’t nobody told you?

Did you watch the Sixty Minutes episode about the McCulkin murders last night?

If you didn’t, you can catch it on replay here.

Once you’ve watched it, perhaps you might ask yourself one simple question:

Given that the trial only ended on Friday, how the hell were the 60 Minutes crew able to put such an in depth and polished piece, replete with interviews with two of the prime witnesses – both in protective police custody in the witness protection program – together in just 48 hours?

It’s a damn good question, because they didn’t.

These interviews were shot during the trial.

The witnesses Warren McDonald (O’Dempsey) and Peter Hall (Dubois) – both of them serious criminals – did not appear on camera because they are nice blokes, reformed characters who wanted to atone for the sin of the claimed silences and set the record straight by telling the public what they say they have known for decades.

They did it because they got paid.

Paid lots and lots. Heaps even,

As much as the reward money that they so earnestly swore to the juries in the respective trials of Dubois and O’Dempsey that they had no intention of claiming.

‘But how could they have signed contracts to be paid to tell their tales when they were in the witness protection program Archie?’ I hear you ask. ‘How could the 60 Minutes team have tracked them down when they were being hidden away by police due to the threats that the name suppressed jailbird singer – a falsetto with multiple convictions for fraud – claimed that O’Dempsey had made against their lives?’

How indeed?

There can be but one answer can there not?

The police told the 60 minutes mob where to find the pair of mugs they were minding, and took the television people right to their safe house door.

The same police who sat silent throughout the trial watching these witnesses gain credibility with the juries by looking the 12 good and honest men and women in the eye and telling them they weren’t here spilling their guts for the reward money, when all the while the cold case team knew that the gut-spillers were getting a big cash kicker from Channel Nine.

Knew because they’d arranged it.

Something is very, very wrong with the way this whole thing has rolled, and if I were in charge of the legal defence teams for either convicted man I know what I would be doing this afternoon: I’d be running down to the Supreme Court of Appeal and making an urgent application for a mistrial, that’s what I’d be doing.

But then I’m just a mug from Geebung.

What the hell would I know?