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The whole Salem circus has hung its’ hats on Hanna’s sworn testimony that CFMEU Secretary Michael Ravbar ordered the wholesale destruction of a ‘7 tonnes’ of documents stored in the CFMEU office at Bowen Hills, and the shredding of many more documents, after the union was served at 1.50PM on 1 April 2014 with a notice to produce a wide range of documents.

The issue has attracted intense interest from the ignorant hacks of the mainstream media, and is certain to feature on front pages of newspapers across the wide brown land this morning, as the low-paid, 20-something owners of laptops and holders of Bachelors of Arts and/or Commerce clamour to outdo each other in their description of allegations of nefarious conduct, pernicious perfidy and terrible trickery by the most wanted man in Salem, Queensland CFMEU Construction Division Secretary Michael Ravbar.

It’s all a great scandal, and most exciting, and would be the sexiest thing on earth for lovers of a good union bash. But for one thing.

The salacious tales of skullduggery are simply not true.

As much as it saddens me to prick the balloons of people like Tony Abbott and Eric Abetz and Gina Reinhardt and Hugh Morgan across the Sunburnt Country, it is my melancholy duty to inform you that the wannabe PR gurus, parliamentary press secretaries, prime-time presenters and pornstars of the common press have their heads stuck 29 miles up their ass – thereby inflicting damage upon their already tender brains – and simply do not have a clue. Not a single clue.

There are 2 reasons for this – the technical, and the evidential.

Allow me to begin with the technical.

The CFMEU, like organisations and businesses across the globe, is autonomous and may act and do as it pleases, provided it complies with its obligations under law. If the CFMEU wants to build a 7000 tonne, 27 storey high paper mache obelisk in memory of Arche – for setting the story straight in this article – then there is nothing that prevents them from doing so, provided that the pieces of paper used in the creation of the obelisk are not one-offs, and are not required to be preserved, either by the myriad of laws regulating unions, or by a notice to produce documents served upon the union by a body such as a Royal Commission or a Salem Witch Trial.

This is problem number one for the chattering and chirping imposters of the Fourth Estate, who pose as our last bastion of liberty, ideas and free speech. Because on the evidence given in Salem to date not a single scrap of paper that was allegedly disposed of or destroyed falls within the ambit of the notice served upon the CFMEU just before 2pm on April Fools Day 2014.

ntp

Not a single sheet. Not a solitary one. Dave the Dog’s fairytale at this stage starts to fall apart. And so do the bedtime stories of the malcontent Mrs and Ma’am’s of the Murdoch media, for their take on the tattle is simply untrue.

Dweeb and the Diva can sensationalize it all they like, but Michael Ravbar was perfectly entitled to order a clean up of the CFMEU office and to throw away the documents that the union did. Or indeed to burn, bury, mulch, shred or use them to build 27 storey high paper mache obelisks of Archie.

If of course he disposed of them at all in the manner described by Hanna, the corrupt union official and the worst witness in the world. Which brings me to the second strand of my argument.

The practical.

David Hanna has given at least 3 different versions of his document removal story, so it is difficult, if not impossible, to know which one to believe. But let’s suspend common sense for a moment and assume that his latest version delivered yesterday was his final edit, and the one he will han his hat on. And consider this evidence:

7tion hoehoehoe

It was a seven tonne truck. And Hanna and 2 other BLF officials – at least one of whom (Brian Humphrey) is a family member, his brother-in-law – loaded it themselves, using Hanna’s backhoe. We know at least that the Hanna backhoe part of the story is true, because we saw evidence on Monday that he paid $12 000 to buy it.

Now look at these two documents. They are the smoking gun evidence tracked down late yesterday afternoon by Smacka after Hanna kindly told her where to look.

bob12 bob1

Notice anything?

I notice a few things.

The truck wasn’t a seven-tonner at all. It was 3.5 tonnes.

And it wasn’t just the tip-truck that Hanna claimed. It was an excavator/bobcat combo. I didn’t think Hanna would deign to get his hands dirty by doing any actual work – he hired someone else to do it.

But here’s the thing that stands out like Ooh La La would stand out walking nude down Queen Street – both invoices contain the same words – ‘level off around bottom of hill’.

Dumps are not built hills.

Mansions are.

Hanna has told us repeatedly that the allegedly destroyed CFMEU documents were in his shed. His shed isn’t at the bottom of a hill. It is on the top of one, next to the Mansion.

sheds

Why would the 3.5m bobcat/excavator driver named Ben be required to level off at the bottom of the hill, if he was simply driving a truck half the size Hanna claims it was – with a bobcat and an excavator on the tray, mind you – up to Hannas shed, watching as Dave the Dog and his brother-in-law loaded up the truck with files and documents, and driving away off to the dump.

Why WOULD he have to level off at the bottom of the hill? After all, he’s just driven straight up and down a driveway to a shed. Think about it.

Hanna is lying. Again. Lying through his teeth.

And Smacka has fallen for it hook, line and sinker. In her excitement she has only seen what she wanted to see, and what Hanna wanted her to see.

When she wakes up to the fact he’s conned her she’s going to be mighty pissed off.

If Hanna thinks he’s got problems now, well he aint seen nothing yet.