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See those balls in the kids playground above?

That’s what they built the Eagle Farm racetrack on.

Dead set.

They weren’t quite plastic balls of course, but rather rounded particles of sand, howeve the net effect is exactly the same. Round things don’t lock together and bind. It doesn’t matter whether they are grains of sand or kids balls or ball bearings in your car’s axle – it’s all the same: they simply can’t because it’s against the laws of physics.

Round thing when packed together and put under the pressure of a downward forcing mass – a dozen horse’s hooves for example, or twenty red cordial drunk kids at a play center 4th birthday party – simply shift and move and wobble and eventually give way.

Just like the Eagle Farm straight did on the last couple of days during the winter carnival that they raced on it, or slid, skated and sunk anyway. What sort of delusional clowns would build a racecourse on such a so obviously unsuitable and inherently dangerous base?

Racing Queensland, that’s who.

We shouldn’t really be surprised though. After all, this is same mob of morons that have implemented a business plan and strategy predicated on the insane belief that if you cut prize money to Kangaroo Island Picnic Racing Club levels you will somehow improve the ‘thoroughbred experience’ and deliver an increase in wagering turnover and revenue.

Yeah that really works doesn’t it?

You only need to look at the BM 80 class stayers handicap race at Doomben on Saturday to see that. The race that was quinellad by a pair of cripples from the Waller stable, one – Devil Hawk – who has been racing on three legs since it broke down 2 years ago and the other – Loving Home – who hasn’t won since Adam was a boy and specialises in both running up other equine’s rears and burning dumb punter’s dough.

The total Ubet win tote hold on that open handicap was just a tick over 30 grand: in a similar distance BM85 race a couple of hours later in Sydney punters put 86 grand into the Ubet win pool.

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Brisbane Race 2, BM 80 Handicap 2200m (above); Sydney Race 5, BM 85 Handicap 2200m (below).

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Cutting prize money and attracting dromedaries is a strategy that really works isn’t it?

I only tell you that true tale to highlight how far from planet earth the current Queensland Racing hierarchy are, and to illustrate the plain and simple truth that these jokers are going to ruin Queensland racing forever if something is not done to stop them.

That’s why over the coming days I am going to lay out for you the whole story of how this mob of clueless Brisbane Racing Company/Club directors and their equally inane masters from Racing Qld totally and utterly screwed up the simple task of laying down a half decent track that horses can actually race on without falling over or breaking both their legs, and how the incompetence of these people who purport to be running racing in the Sunshine State has cost the taxpayer $20 million dollars and more.

I’m calling it the Great Incredible Eagle Farm (Gravel, Sand and Grass) Debacle.

One you’ve read what I’m going to tell you sportsfans, you will too.

Watch this space.

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Hey Mum, this new Eagle Farm track’s really great!