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What exactly was it that Albion Park Harness Racing Club (APHRC) Chairman David Fowler – The Rooster – was wrong about?

(A) Bulsh*tting to Archie and then dogging him after having given the fellow journalist an iron-clad off-the-record discussion guarantee?

Definitely.

(B) That the appointment of Eliot Forbes as CEO of Racing Queensland lit a light at the end of a tunnel for harness racing fans?

No.

There are many harness lovers who believe that the future lies at a new purpose built facility, not at Albion Park, and Forbes and his crew are showing every sign of delivering that future, and may well have already if Fowler and his Treasurer Clip Clop Kev hadn’t held the whole industry in suspended animation for reasons of their own.

(C) That the faithful members of the Albion Park club deserved some light to guide them out of the black hole that he has lead the club deep into?

Absolutely.

The members of the APHRC do deserve a ray of sunshine after the four long years that they have spent in the dark under the leadership of The Rooster. If you need any convincing of that just take a look at the graphs below.

The first one illustrates the annual profit and loss figures for the club from the years 2013 – 2017, although as you can see there is no nexus whatsoever between the word profit and the Rooster’s reign as Chairman since he took over in 2014.

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It’s not a particularly impressive record of financial achievement is it?

In fact I’d venture to suggest that the club’s profit and loss results under The Rooster’s watch are nothing short of bloody appalling, and posit that if he was an aged racehorse rather than a fast-ageing fiscal incompetent you’d probably shoot him.

The problem lies not just in the four consecutive red sheets he has produced in the accounts either, for the assets of the club have been disappearing like amyl nitrate up a popper-loving pleasure seeker’s nasal passages since King Cock-a-doodle-doo came to power, and in just four short years 20% of the net worth of the APHRC has vanished into the addled haze.

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A picture tells a thousand words doesn’t it?

Conversely, a thousand words of hot air paints a picture as well, and the brush strokes of  The Rooster’s failed promises to his members on the sponsorship front paint a damning portrait of his 4-year leadership of the Albion Park club, during which his standout achievement has been to channel the spirit of former Joh-era Minister Vince Lester and teach his members the hitherto in the harness world long-lost art of walking backwards,  fast.

This is The Rooster on sponsorship.

Year 1 – 2014/15 – The Rooster Says the Sponsorship Buck Stops Here

As a proactive club, your committee is regularly examining proposals to enhance the venue for members, the general public and stakeholders.

Sponsorship levels are adequate but, as Chairman, I believe this is one area where the club needs to bolster its performance and I will be taking the lead in 2015-16 to improve our revenue through increased sponsorship

Year 2 – 2015/16 – The Rooster Fails to Deliver So Passes the Sponsorship Buck to the Bloke Who Takes the Polaroid Snaps

While sub-standard facilities provide little enticement to potential sponsors, the club is still determined to pursue opportunities in this area and has contracted our popular photographer Dan Costello to manage this role. Dan will also engage with present sponsors and those that were previously with the club.

Year 3 – 2016/17 – The Rooster Declares the Sponsorship Buck Lost and Labels New Sponsors as HP, Tomato and Barbeque Sources

Sponsorship is difficult to procure with a substandard facility but new sponsors were sources while Kevin and Key Seymour and the Garrard family continued their very generous support and must be acknowledged, in particular.

I wonder if it ever crossed the Rooster’s mind that when you only have about 3 men and a dog attending the Trots on a Saturday night, and just the dog midweek, your ‘build it and they will come’ pitch for $14 million to build a flash grandstand for the Nobody family to sit in is viewed by the whole world outside of Albion Park as nothing more than a joke, particularly when there’s no strategic business plan to go with it and the only supporting documentation attached is 4 years of losses totaling $600 grand.

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Those of us with masochistic tendencies don’t need to piss $14 million down a once fine billabong that’s been so despoiled by vandals, fixers and thieves that it’s been transformed into a crooked well to get our pervy-pain jollies Rooster. We can simply slip down to the dungeon in Spring Hill for a flogging, and if you want a lift there’s a spare spot in the back seat of the Escort.

The great Kenny Rogers taught us all that the wise man knows when to hold ’em, and knows when to fold ’em, and that he knows when to walk away, and when to run.

The buck stops at the top Rooster, right at your door.

Kenny’s told you what you need to do. Be a man and do it.

On your mark.

Get set.

Go!