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Well Trista was too busy too attend the inquiry into her more bent than a Beckham soccer ball drive in the Group 2 trot at Albion Park on Saturday night, and has advised QRIC officials that she needs a bit more time to prepare, so the simplest stewards hearing in the history of the world has been adjourned until Friday morning.

No doubt one or more of her high profile stable owners – Clip Clop Kev or Greg ‘Jake the Peg’ (because he’s Clip Clop’s wooden leg) Mitchell – is organising a high priced QC to represent her, so it will be interesting to see who she has in tow when she finally fronts.

If I was Mrs Dixon (nee Baz) I would be engaging a Queer Customer (QC) too, because the charge she has been hit with is the most serious available under the Australian Harness Racing Rules – and quite rightly too given her disgraceful conduct – and if found guilty she is staring straight down the barrel of a 10 year disqualification and a future working behind the counter at Coles, if there are any humans left manning the registers in the years to come.

She is an absolute gimme to get scrubbed because Blind Freddy and his companion dog can see clearly that she hooked her horse out of the way to let hubby Grant ‘Moses’ (because he parted the Red Sea) Dixon through on Ouroveranova and on to victory, and the only real question now is whether Moses will be following in his wife’s footsteps by being charged with the same offence.

It’s just a damn shame there is no audio of the drivers during the race, particularly from the home turn on, because if Moses didn’t blow the George Moore whistle by calling out to his ever loving bride then my bony white arse isn’t pointing at the ground and I’m not here.

I guess it all depends upon whether the stewards form a view that Trista was just being a good old fashioned 1950’s wife and fetching her hubby’s pipe and slippers ready for him coming up the driveway at the end of the day, or whether that take the modern view of marriage as a joint partnership and decide that the Bantam’s one time bonk in his younger, more experimental days was in on it too.

Personally I hope its the latter.

I have made no secret of the fact that I hold a firm view that both of the Dixon’s are as dirty as Provan and Summons jerseys after the Grand Final played in the mud, and in my humble view the sport would be far better off without both of them.

We’ll just have to sit back and see what happens I guess.

Watch this space.

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